Thursday 12 April 2018

Interesting lingo used in the Kenyan cycling scene



It's gonna be a long one, but you are gonna love it!

Cycling in Kenya just like in most parts of the world is a sub-culture in its own right. As with any culture, there’s always a means of communicating; the same is true within the Kenya cycling community. The following are some terms and phrases that you will probably come across or have already come across if you regularly ride your bike and interact with other Kenyan cyclists.

Kukatika
This is probably the most common phrase among cyclists who get a rush from competing. It simply means ‘to get dropped’ while riding. If you go on a ride with riders who are stronger than you then ‘kukatwa’ is a very probable outcome. Don’t take it too personally, train harder.

The writer trying to 'kata' Don Permy at the 1st edition of Zuzu's Highway to Heaven race in 2015


Jembe – A term used to refer to the biggest gear-ring on your bike. It is the hardest gear to use and is recommended on flat terrains and descents. Of course there’s always that one guy who insists on climbing the steepest of gradients using this ring. More often than not they end up getting dropped earlier than anyone else. Cycling is about expending your energy in the most efficient manner possible, use this gear wisely.

Jembe engaged. Credit: Moses Kamwere
Nyengesa – A term used to refer to the middle gear-ring on a mountain bike. On (most) road bikes it is simply referred to as the small ring because that’s how road bikes are designed – with only two gear-rings. If you are looking to master the cadence (spinning) game, this is the gear you want to use on a regular.

Cucu – This is the Kikuyu word for ‘grandmother’ and refers to the smallest gear- ring. It is mostly present on mountain bikes. It’s a wonderful gear to use on steep and technical off-road accents or when you are absolutely exhausted during a ride and just want to get home.

Kuiva – directly translates to ‘getting cooked’. This is what happens when you ride too fast for too long. If you are in a group, kuiva is what precedes kukatika.
VeloNos' G Baby Alan showing clear signs of kuiva at the 2016 Tour of Machakos (Day 4)
Credit: Moses Kamwere
Weka/wekelea/weka pace/finya – any time you hear this in a pro-peloton or a group ride just know that it is time to up the pace. When people start to ‘wekelea pace’ or 'finya' their bikes, only the strongest will survive. The rest will ‘iva’ and eventually 'katika'.

Fanya kazi – Translated to English, this means ‘to work’. So when you hear it mentioned in the Kenya cycling context just know that whoever it is directed to is required to get in front of a riding group and shield other riders from the wind. When all members of a riding group ‘fanya kazi’ equally, the net energy saved could be anything from 20-40%. This will automatically translate to an increase in the average speed. Obviously this is what all cyclists want even if they don't say it.

Kupe – This is the Swahili word for a flea. Within the Kenyan cycling scene it simply refers to someone who never ‘fanyas kazi’, i.e. he or she would rather ride at the back of a group and let everyone else work for him or her. Nobody likes a ‘kupe’. In fact the common goal during group rides is to ‘kata’ all ‘kupe’ at the earliest possible opportunity.

Kuuma – In English this literally means to bite and it is exactly what 'kupe' do. They dig their teeth on the backs of animals and stay there forever. As you might have already figured, kuuma in the local cycling context means staying behind someone’s wheel so as to benefit from their draught. It is worth noting however that just because a cyclist decides to ‘uma’ behind other riders doesn’t necessarily mean he or she is a kupe although in many cases that’s usually the case. The following are valid reasons for ‘kuuma-ing’ behind other riders:

  • ·         If you are riding a mountain bike among road-bikes
  • ·         If you are genuinely the weakest link in a riding group
  • ·         If you have already done your time in the wind for the group
  • ·         If the guy in front of you is your domestique/mule
Any other reason given, deviating from the above is probably a ‘proverb’ - which leads us to the next term in  Kenya’s cycling lingo.

A good example of 'kuuma' by Kenya Riders' Rashid Kosgei behind VeloNos' Joseph Kamau
Credit: Moses Kamwere


Proverb – In this wonderful community of ours, a proverb is not a wise saying as is described in most dictionaries. It simply refers to an excuse given for NOT doing something cycling-related or for doing something in a certain way during a cycling activity. A good example of a proverb is the following statement by someone after ‘kukatika’ in a race: “Manze, sijakua nikitrain poa” (I haven’t been training well enough) - this coming from a person who had been clocking 400KM every week in the weeks leading up to the race.

Another example is this statement from a person who gets dropped on a climb: “mguu ya nyuma ilikua inashika brake” (my rear brakes had ‘self-engaged’). It sucks to get dropped; proverbs help make life a little more bearable. There are many other situations where ‘cycling proverbs' are used. I will delve deeper into that in a different article.

Hippo/Descendant – This refers to a heavy cyclist and who is most probably gifted when it comes to riding down descents. Obviously, 'descendant' has been corruptly obtained from the word 'descend' to mean someone who has serious guts and skills when it comes to riding downhill. A descendant may not necessarily be a hippo (heavy). I know a good number of cyclists weighing well under 70KG who can descend like rocket propelled grenades.

VeloNos' very own Baby hippo descending at the Zuzu-VeloNos Gathaithi ITT
Credit: Moses Kamwere

Kukata upepo – This simply means reducing the negative effect of wind during riding. There are several methods people use to ‘kata upepo’:

  • ·         Riding behind other riders (kukatiwa upepo/ kufanyiwa kazi)
  • ·         Drafting behind vehicles
  • ·         Making use of aerodynamic wear such as time trial helmets, TT bars, TT suits and TT bikes
  • ·         Aerodynamic tuck – this involves going as low as possible on the bike. A good example is sitting on the bike frame and bending your upper body towards the handlebar. It works wonders but don’t try it if you don’t know what you are doing.
TT Bars at the Velonos Southern Bypass ITT. Credit: Moses Kamwere


Specialized TT bike.  Best example of an aerodynamic machine that 'katas upepo'


Kubonk – or simply bonking refers to a situation where the body runs out of usable muscle glycogen i.e. the fuel that powers your body once you run out of blood sugar. I once ate 12 mandazis in 10 minutes flat as a result of this phenomenon – no tea, soda or water to wash it down. I also know two people who almost fought over pineapple peelings during a long ride when they couldn’t find a food kiosk; I kid you not! Bonking takes you to a very primal state of existence and teaches you to appreciate food in a whole new way.


Thigh-roids - If you ever hear someone mention this word within the Kenyan cycling circles, don't think they are talking about the thyroid glands located somewhere on our neck. As the name suggests, thigh-roids are basically (conspicuous/well-developed) thigh muscles that cyclists who have have been in the game for a while possess. Bib-shorts tend to accentuate them quite significantly because of the tight fit. If you want thigh-roids, train hard and if possible, do some squats from time to time.

Team VeloNos' David Ndatha showing thigh-roids as he gets off the saddle at the 2016 Tatu City Road Race. Credit:
Tony Githinji Photography

The look - It's not a very common term in the general local cycling population but very popular among Team Velonos boys. It simply refers to the facial expression most cyclists make when they are deep inside the red zone. The term came about as a result of seeing VeloNos' Brian Flame in action as evidenced in the photo below. The jury has been out for a few years on whether what he shows is pain, pleasure or a combination of both.

VeloNos' Brian Flame giving us 'the look'
Credit: Moses Kamwere
Feel free to add more terms......
 


Sunday 1 April 2018

Cycling on Kenyan roads: A few vital tips




I love this country dearly, don’t even get me wrong but let me just say that this geographical location on the African map has its fair share of lunatics! I kid you not. Forget about politicians, cartels and other crooked individuals; I am talking about (SOME) Kenyan motorists. 

So what does this mean for you as an individual cycling in this great country? Sell your bike and pick another hobby? No. Here are several tips that will go a long way in helping you stay sane and most importantly safe on Kenyan roads.

Be predictable at all times 
Most roads in this country do not have designated cycling lanes. This means that 80-90% of the time you will be riding right next to metallic contraptions zooming past you at 60KPh or more. To stay safe you have to be predictable. I have seen a number of cyclists riding in zig zags on public roads like they are climbing a 20% gradient. Not cool. What these riders don’t understand is that this type of riding confuses and annoys most motorists and the most unsettling thing is that there are some crazy ones out there who might decide to ‘teach you a lesson’. To avoid unnecessary drama, always ride in a consistent straight line.

Use hand signals
This is closely related to the first point. If you are making a right turn, indicate with your right hand and vice versa if you are turning left. And even as you do so, slow down to ensure that your intentions have been acknowledged by motorists. I have seen cyclists make turns at intersections without bothering to check what’s coming from behind or from adjoining roads simply because they ‘are in a hurry’. This my friends is how you significantly increase your risk on the road as a Kenyan cyclist. Always let motorists know what you intend to do at intersections and double-confirm that all is clear before proceeding.

Common hand signals from right left to right: Turning left; turning right: turning right; slowing down/stopping
Source: https://velojoy.com/2014/08/05/guide-to-using-hand-signals/



Wear your helmet
There is crop of people who hate helmets. Here is another way you can write that sentence: There is a crop of people who don’t value their brains. If you are going out for a ride on a public road, just wear a darn helmet and stop being so stubborn.
A popular argument among the anti-helmet batallion is that helmets don’t offer 100% protection; well guess what, NOTHING IN THIS WORLD DOES. Let me ask you this; in the event that your head meets tarmac during a crash, what would you rather have as protection for your grey matter - your hair or something a little harder? I think that’s a no-brainer (pun intended). 

I know of a few people who would probably not be alive or messed up upstairs if they weren’t wearing a helmet on a particular day, during a particular ride. So whatever percentage of protection that helmets offer, you bloody well take it. It’s better than 0.
Cracked bike helmet: This could have been someone's skull





Stay visible
For most part, cycling wear is pretty colourful and so if you are riding on a clear day, you should be quite conspicuous. Riding in the dark and on days when there’s low visibility is however a very different story.

Kenyan bike commuters looking very visible


If a driver cannot see you from a good enough distance then you are going to have a problem in case of an emergency. His/her reaction to your presence will be significantly affected and that my friends, is bad news for you. If you ride in the aforementioned conditions then you should have the following in your cycling arsenal: 



  1. ·        Hi-viz jackets and bag covers,
  2. ·        General reflective wear
  3. ·        Blinkers and bike lights


Reflective bag covers

 Watch out for motorbikes
To stay healthy on Kenyan roads heed this: you have to be exceptionally wary of motorbikes aka ‘pikipikis’/nduthis’/ boda bodas. I have got nothing against these guys, but if you live in this country then I am pretty sure you will agree with me that most boda boda operators have little to no regard for other road users or their own safety. They will ride on cycling lanes, pavements, against the flow of traffic and even join a main road without confirming if all is clear. To put it simply, be very careful when you spot one of these guys on your radar.

It's just a cow
Source: http://kenyanauto.blogspot.co.ke/2016/02/additional-safety-gear-for-kenyan.html


Stay calm
Riding your bike on Kenyan roads means that you will have to deal with uncouth and inconsiderate motorists. While it is tempting to lose your cool and react to idiocy on their part, I would recommend that you try as much as possible not to. Not that I would judge you if you did, because as I said, there are some really annoying people out there.
Be that as it may, the reality is that when you lose your cool when for example someone bumps you with their car’s side mirror or pushes you off the road, the situation can escalate really fast. Let’s say you decide to chase them down and burst their tail light or side mirror as payback. So the driver stops, comes out angry. Now there are two very pissed people cursing in the middle of the road. To say the least, things might end up getting physical - to the detriment of both parties.

I have been known to be quite fiery when provoked on the road because my threshold for B.S is extremely low. Over the years however, I have learnt to tame my reactions for sanity’s sake. Don’t get me wrong, I fully appreciate the need to let it be known to inconsiderate motorists that we too have a right to use the road (and I do so often), but from my experience, a good number of these offenders are usually very repentant once you inform them of their sins in a calm/collected manner. Of course we don’t always get an opportunity to do so because some of these motorists simply zoom past after committing an offence. If it’s something as serious as knocking down of a cyclist, try and get the plates, if it’s minor and you can’t do much, the one finger salute might give you some reprieve.

Pedestrians
Most people believe that (reckless) motorists are the worst offenders when it comes to making life difficult for cyclists. To be honest however, I think I have had just as much trouble with pedestrians - if not more - than I have had with motorists. Here are few things worth noting about this particular group of road users:



  • ·        They can decide to pull a catwalk right in the middle of the highway
  • ·        They don’t take bicycles as seriously as they do cars. Dude/chic will see you coming and proceed to cross the road!
  • ·        They text while crossing the road
  • ·        Some will pause in the middle of the road for no apparent reason
  • ·        They are some of the most unpredictable road users, rivaled only by ‘nduthis’ and livestock.


Let me just reply to this text while crossing the road: Source: https://www.jilllawrencehealth.com/jackass-jaywalkers/


So a word of caution: be very careful when you see a pedestrian just about to cross the road.